JibJab

This is great! I love this site. You just upload your pictures, adjust them and voila, you get a funny ass video right away. Go to www.jibjab.com and let the fun begin. I got hooked on this site around Christmas last year when you could "elf" yourself. Funny. Go try it out and enjoy my Monster Mash. LOL. Edited to add: Go to the bottom of my page and hit the stop button on my music player before playing the video so you are not hearing two different things at the same time.

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Toes Taste Good

Who would have thought that toes were this good. LOL. My grandson sure thinks they are yummy! I guess the first thing you have to be to eat your toes in limber. This definitely leaves me out. The second thing I think you have to become accustomed to the taste of them. What do they taste like anyway? And the third thing is you have to be as cute as he is doing it. Check him out as he has perfected the act of eating his toes.

Testing Windows Live

This is just a test to see how Windows Live works with my blog.

This Crazy Bulldog

So if any of you reading this know me, I am usually up at 5:00 a.m. every morning and don't go back to bed. So this morning I take the hubby to work and come back. The dog is still sleeping in his crate and I was so tired I decided to go back to bed.

Well, apparently he figured I should not be sleeping because I was not back in bed any more than 10 minutes when he starts barking. I get up out of bed and take him out to do his business. We come back into the house and he wants a biscuit, his usual morning ritual, and he goes back in his crate. I figure I can get back in bed and sleep for about an hour before I have to get the little person up and get her ready for school.

Wrong! This dog started barking and would not shut up! And he did not bark just once in a while, he barked continuously. I ended getting back up out of bed and told him to shut the hell up. Once I am up, he decides he is going back to sleep and the next thing I hear is snoring. I love that dog, but was not loving him this morning. I guess he was trying to tell me that I needed to be up so he could sleep easy.

Mom Is On My Mind

Wow, two blogs in one day. I must be feeling ill. LOL.

I found this terrific song called Address in the Stars and I instantly thought about my mom and how it would make such a great song for a video about her. I think about her every day and for some reason as of late I have been thinking about her a lot and seem to miss her more now than ever. Maybe it is because of the many stresses in my life right at the moment.

I realized right before she died that you should not take advantage of the people in your life because before you know it they may be gone. I have learned that you should not sweat the little things in life, there are way more important things than who said what about who. There are many things that I wanted to say to her, but never did, and now I wish that I would have. I kind of think I put a wall up about her illness, not wanting to be too emtional for her. Lord knows, she could cry. Unfortunately, I think I have the same trait. Geez, I even cry at Hallmark commercials.

If I could say one thing to her now it would be to tell her that I miss her every day and what she meant to me in my life and no matter what dramas we were going through, and at times there were many, that I always loved her and never once thought what it would be like when she was gone, that it would be this painful. She taught me that there are many struggles in life and that nothing is so bad that it won't get better. I wish I had some of that better right now. (Sigh). She taught me that material possesions are not as important as the love of your family. It's strange... something will be going on in my life, (what's new?), something about work, or I will read something and I think to myself, "I should call mom," or, "I haven't talked to mom in a while," but I can't call her. That's one of the things that I took for granted, that I was able to just pick up a phone and she was there.

She will forever be in my heart until the day I die, and this will definitely not be the last blog about my mom and definitely not the last video. My grandchildren will grow up knowing her, knowing all about her, and hopefully they will pass that on to their children long after I am gone. Ha, I remember telling my father-in-law right before he passed that he should tell them "upstairs" what a good person I was and ask them to give me a free pass. I like to think that there has got to be something better than this, the life we have now, where all our loved ones are happy, not suffering, and together.

So here is the video that I made. Some lyrics:
"Without you here with me,
I don't know what to do.
I'd give anything
Just to talk to you
Oh it breaks my heart..."

I hope you like the video and I do love comments on my Blogger (hint, hing). Until next time....

First Day Of Third Grade

Wow! It's been quite some time since I updated my blog. I really need to be more active with this, because we all know I have a lot on my mind. LOL. I make myself laugh, I hope I make you laugh too! Anyway, there are so many different things going on with my life and in the world.

We'll start today with Haily's first day back to school. Yay! I love her so much, but she was just bored hanging with the old lady and needed to be around kids. I think I was as excited as she was to return to school. She is now in 3rd grade. Amazing, it seems that time has really passed by so quickly. When she first came here she wasn't even in school yet and went on to attend Head Start, 1st, 2nd, and now 3rd grade. She has grown so much over the summer too. Pajama pants that were long on her in the late winter are now way too short.

So here are some pics and a short video taken on her first day of 3rd grade. She ought to be a model, maybe I need to check into that, she loves posing for the camera and you can never take enough pictures of her. The video is cute and what she says in it is right! LOL. I hope you enjoy it, and I will try to make more posts more often.

Steve and Kayla - 21 Years Ago Yesterday

Well anyone who reads this knows that I am a very big Steve and Kayla fan from Days of Our Lives. I got hooked first on Steve from the first time he stepped foot in Salem, through the love story of Steve and Kayla, Steve's death, their return in 2006 to find that Steve was actually still alive, up until they were let go by the jackasses over there in charge at Days of Our Lives. A fellow fan over at www.steveandkayla.com Jen made this awesome video. She does really great work and captures the magic that is Steve and Kayla. Enjoy.

Michael Jackson - Enough Already

So Michael Jackson has died. I don't know about anybody else, but I totally was not surprised to hear this at all. He had admitted in the past that he was hooked on drugs. The only thing that kind of surprised me was that he had his own IV setup in his home and when he was on the road. Pretty bizarre to me.

I don't want to take anything away from Michael, he was a great entertainer, singer, songwriter, dancer, choreographer, humantarian, and apparently a great father to his three children. Aside from that, he was also a drug addict and drug abuser. He had been accused at least two times of being a child molester. I am not convinced that he did not do this. He paid millions of dollars in 2003 and acquitted of the other allegation (don't remember what year that was). He was a strange person to put it mildly.

I for one do not like the fact that he has now been put on a pedestal and that every time you turn around you hear and see Michael Jackson. He is now gone, but his music will live on. I don't want to hear about Michael Jackson any longer, how the mother of his two children may seek custody, which in my opinion she has not right to, she gave them to him and wanted no contact with them whatsoever, and in my opinion it is now time to let him rest in peace, peace it seems that he could never have acheived in his life here on earth.

Happy Birthday In Heaven

I have been real lax in posting a new blog and today is the perfect day to do one. Today is my mom's birthday, the first one without her. It is a sad day for me. Even if I did not see her on her birthday, I always called to wish her a happy birthday. Hopefully she is having an awesome day today no matter where she is.

I miss my mom so much, miss the little things. I miss calling her and talking about the work that we did, I miss talking to her about family and what she has been doing. I miss that she is not here to see her latest grandchild and share in my joy of that. I miss when I am having a difficult day calling and talking to her about it and her listening. She would give her opinion, but was never judgemental. She went through a lot in her life and was understanding of everything She was taken away too soon and I just wish she was here one last time so I could tell her one more time how much she meant to me and how much I loved her. Our family was not one that always expressed those things to each other and I really wish we were more like that. Here's my bit of advice to anyone who may read this... tell the ones that you love each day what they mean to you because you may not have tomorrow to do that.

Here's a video that I made about a month ago and the words fit perfectly for how I feel: "It wasn't long enough together, but it was long enough to last forever." A piece of my heart is missing and I think it is something that will always be missing from my life until we meet again. I will love my mom forever and keep her memory alive to my grandchildren.

So happy birthday to my mom. I miss you, I love you, and I will see you on the other side when it is time, her "booby".

Was It A Sign???

Today I am going to blog about something that was very strange, but very real to me. On Friday night, May 1, I had a dream about my mother. Let me just start by saying that I haven't dreamed about my mom since right after her death. I remember she looked so healthy and happy, smiling and laughing. She told me that she was not coming back but not to be sad, that she was happy. I told her that if she was not coming back then I had one request from her. That request was to look over my grandchildren and make sure that they were safe and healthy. She said she would and then she was gone or I woke up, I don't really remember. This dream seemed so real to me, like she was really there. I remember when my father in-law was ill he told me he had a dream about his dad and when I asked him if it was real he said that he was not sure. That is the same feeling that I had when I woke up.

On Saturday, May 2, my husband, my grand daughter and I were doing a little shopping, went to see my granson, went to the plant store on 5th Street, and then were heading home. For some reason I had my grand daughter sit behind the driver's seat instead of the passenger seat. She rarely ever sits on that side of the car. She got in the car and then my husband put the flat of plants where she normally sits because the trunk was full of groceries.

We were heading up 5th Street right before Chipperfield when all of the sudden this deer comes out of no where and hits the passenger side of the car sideways. My husband said it looked like it was the biggest deer he had ever seen. He said he saw it hit the side of the car, at which point my husband turned his head very quickly. The deer took off the side mirror, put a small dent in the rear passenger door, and blew out both passenger windows.


A side view of the car.



You can actually see where my husband's feet were on the floor.


You can see the plants in the back and all the glass where my grand daughter was sitting.

I said "What the f#$k was that" and then pulled over to the side of the road. There was glass in every part of that car, on the dash, on the floor, on the seats, in the ashtray, in all of the vents, and even between the driver's doors and the seats, and all over us. Our first concern was our grand daughter. She was crying, but more out of fear than being hurt. She only got a few small cuts, only like paper cuts, on her one arm. She was so scared. Then I noticed that my husband's face got a couple of cuts on it and was bleeding. It looked worse than what it was. I asked him if he needed an ambulance and he said no, that he was OK. We called the cops and after they left we drove on home.

Now back to the reason for this blog. I am by no means what would be considered a religious person. I believe in God and also like to think that when we are no longer on this ride called life that we go to a better place. I truly believe that my mom coming to me in a dream was a sign from her and that she was looking over my grand daughter and protecting her, and that she is our guardian angel. I have no other explanation for why I had her sit on the other side of the car. Normally my husband would just put the flat in behind the driver's seat and she would sit where she normally sits behind the passenger seat. We are so thankful that she was not sitting there because she would have taken the brunt of all that glass and would most likely have been severely cut or worse. All I can say is thank you mom for protecting my grand daughter.

Today it has been 4 months since my mom passed away. Even though she is gone she is still with us and around us, I believe that. The sadness does not go away, but we all do what we have to do to survive and keep her in our memory. She was the most giving person, always smiling even though things were not always great, and touched ever person she came in contact with. Thanks again Mom. Keep watching over my grand children and seeing to it that they are safe. I have no doubt you were there with us on Saturday. I will love you always.

Sissy's Song

I made another music video of my mom. Why do I continue to do this to myself? I guess I want everyone to always remember her and this is the best way I can think of to keep her in everyone's minds. I bawl the whole time that I make the video and then after. When I heard this song I instantly thought about my mom and could not resist making this video. It tells about not understanding why and the hope that she is in a much better place. I hope you like it and leave a comment if you wish.

I am missing my mom a lot lately and I thought that I had it together pretty good. Maybe it has something to do with my little Logan, spring because she loved flowers, or just that I can't call and see how she is doing and just chat, or the fact that I am dreading Mother's Day coming up next month and not having my mom here with me anymore.

Twitter

It seems that everyone is doing it from politicians, to TV personalities, singers, newspapers, you name it, everybody is doing it, including me. Check out my widget on the side and follow me. It's a pretty cool site, just short little sentences to tell what you are doing/thinking. I have to remind myself to go do it, but I am trying to get used to it. Hope to see some tweets from you. Go here and start "tweeting". www.twitter.com

Steve and Kayla's Exit (or non-exit)

So it has been about a month since Steve and Kayla were last seen on Days of Our Lives. So since I have cooled down, as they were my favorites and the reason I came back to Days, I have to say that they got screwed royally! They have barely been given a storyline in the past 10 months and they didn't even get a decent sendoff. They were last seen in the hospital and that was it. Supposedly they are still in Salem, somewhere, with little Joe. Hell, they're getting more mention now that they are not on air anymore than when they were actually there. In a way I am glad that they didn't have closure on them because the Hack would have definitely gave them more of a screwing than Marlena and John or Tony and Anna. And let's not forget what she did to Roscoe or Blake.

Days missed the boat on Stephen Nichols and Mary Beth Evans. No other daytime couple ever brought the highest ratings that this show has ever seen. Both are excellent actors and there are so many different storylines they could have given them. The one that I would have like to see the most is Victor and Steve going at each other since Philip and Stephanie are on now.

I got hooked on Days from the first time Steve "Patch" showed up in Salem. I loved that bad ass dude and still do.



While he was working for Victor he then went to Cleveland to get Kayla back to Salem. I loved him in that nurses hat with that yellow rose, which woudl become a symbol of Steve and Kayla's love story. He was such a good "bad" guy. It's not wonder that TPTB decided to keep him on instead of being a character that breezed in and out of town in a flash.



The love story of Steve and Kayla had it all! Back then there was no internet to check out what was going to happen next on Prevuze or any other spoiler site. I actually looked forward to watching Days every day and in fact even missed work on occasion because I was not sure if that damned VCR was going to work or not. My favorite of all scenes has to be the poisoning rescue scene. Any time that Steve was climbing through a window with a knife hanging out of his mouth and then add to that the emotion that only Stephen Nichols can do, well damn, he should have won an Emmy long ago. And even though a lot of people couldn't stand that song, I loved If Your Heart Comes Out Tonight.



I could post a million clips, and will post more I'm sure in another post, but I will miss Steve and Kayla and will continue to work to bring them back. It seems like if you over 40 on this show, you are shit! Here's hoping that TPTB see the light and realize what they have lost in Steve and Kayla and that their story is not over yet.

Introducing Logan Michael

This blog is all about my newest grandson, Logan Michael. Isn't he cute. He made his appearance on March 9, 2009 at 11:26 p.m. weighing in at 8 lbs. 5 oz and 21 inches long. He had us worried for a little bit of time, but all in all he is perfect, and he has the biggest feet I have ever seen on a baby. He got a little boogered up on his way here, but that has cleared up nicely. He had a bit of jaundice, but that is all better now. I guess he was a little shy because he waited until everyone left the hospital and then he decided he was ready to show up even though the midwife said that it was going to be quite a while until he was born. I guess he didn't want an audience. He certainly has one now. I just want to say thank you to his mom and dad for such a beautiful grandson. He has definitely stolen the hearts of everyone, especially this grammy.

Baby Shower For Heather

This past Sunday we had a baby shower for Heather, and Mike too, at their house. It was really nice with quite a few people coming from McDonald's, Mikes grandparents, Sarah, Rose, my friend Judy, and some other friends. Sorry to anyone from out of town that was not invited, but I figured that you would not want to drive for hours just to come to a baby shower. It was nice, we had food, cake, and a good time. The only downfall was that after Heather opened the presents everyone just left. So needless to say we did not have many games or things of that sort.

Logan will be well dressed! Heather received a lot of onsies, one piece outfits, gowns (my favorite for newborns), blankets, washcloths, bibs, some bottles, socks... just about anything you can imagine. Grammy (me) bought a nice bassinette and Grandpa (George) bought a crib. The only thing that they didn't get was diapers, which was a little odd, but we can get them.

We had a really great time and now everyone is ready for Logan to make his arrival, which can be any day now. I am so looking forward to this baby and since I am such a titty baby I'm sure I will be bawling like a baby. It's a Bush thing I guess.

I was a little sad about the shower because I had talked with my mom about it about 2 months before she passed away and she said that she would be there and was looking forward to it. I'm sure she was there with us, but it is not the same. Beleive me, Logan will know what a great person his great-grammy was and he we love her just like we all do.

Mom

It has taken me some time to come to be able to write this particular blog and is very difficult to do. This blog is dedicated to my mother, Roberta Hamilton. Mom left us on January 4, 2009, just four weeks ago. I will never forget when the phone rang that morning. I knew what it was and just could not bring myself to get up and answer that phone. There are so many things that I want to say about her and I just don't know where to begin. Like most mothers and daughters, me and mom did not always see eye to eye. I guess we just went through different stages. There was a time that mom and I did not speak much and I just wish that I could have those years back. When you lose someone in your life as important as she was to me then you realize that you cannot sweat the little things. They are not important, the best thing you can do is learn from them and grow as a person. I like to think that she has given me the ability to do that, to be patient, caring, loving, and also forgiving.

I remember my mom as someone that struggled a lot in her life with many things from her health, to finances, to emotions, but she was also a beautiful woman and had a huge heart. One thing that I always knew was that she loved me with all her heart, as she did all of her children. Each of us, Richard, Rose, Me, Michael, and Kristina, had a different kind of relationship with her and each special in its own way. She was very proud of us each for our accomplishments and our families.




Every time Richard would get a promotion at the cancer center she would call and say how proud she was of him and that he was such a hard worker. She trusted his judgement fully, as we all did, when it came to her treatment and for all of us there was just no better thing than to have her receive her treatment at the hospital he was employed at so that she could be close to him. He was so dedicated to her and had a very heavy load to carry, which he did with grace. I'll admit that there were times that I guess I did not have a full understanding of what was happening in regard to her treatment and questioned the treatment that she was receiving. I now know how difficult it was for my brother and I want to say a special thank you to him for everything that he did for mom. I know he will say that he does not need that, that he did it out of his love for her, but he is a wonderful person for what he did and if I ever said anything to him that was offensive, I am sorry from the bottom of my heart.

When Kristina would get a commendation from the Air Force she would just rave about how she was doing. In fact, one of my last conversatoins with her was talking about a copy of a letter that she received about her and she read each line of it to me on the phone.

She was very proud of how far Rose had come in her life and how Rose's grandchildren seemed to change her outlook on life. Rose was there at the end and I am very proud of her as well, she stayed strong when she needed to and I thank her for that as well.

She spoke about how Mike had found a wonderful wife and family that loved him very much and that he seemed very happy. She was very happy when Mike stopped and spent the night at her house in November 2008. She hadn't seen him in some time and was just tickled pink that he was there. She talked about him showing her online what he did for a living and how proud she was of him as well.

I'm sure that she was very proud of me as well. My relationship with her was rocky at times, but in the last couple of years it was wonderful. We talked on the phone all of the time. We also worked for the same company and I can remember having bitch fests about work in general. She taught me how to do the work and was a great teacher. It didn't matter what the question was, she always had the answer. I remember the day that she told me that she had cancer. I tried so hard to be strong, but when I hung up the phone I bawled my eyes out. My approach with her cancer was try to be positive all of the time with her, to keep her spirits up and give her encouragement, but she was the strong one. She always said that she would beat it, always positive and fighting against this aweful disease. She stayed that way until the very end too. I remember shortly after she passed away my niece saying that she was so strong up until she had to be very medicated and I believe that she did that for all of her children and grandchildren, to help us all get through what we all knew was happening. And I believe that she knew what was happening too. I remember one of the lasts times that I visited her I bought her a bouquet of flowers that included a teddy bear. Here she is holding it. I remember the day that this picture was taken. I asked her if she brushed her hair that day and she said that she brushed it 100 strokes each day. We laughed because she had a way of making you smile even in the worst of times.



She loved all of her family very much. I remember her speaking about all of her brothers and sisters and how much she missed them. She loved her mother with all her heart also.

I remember many hard times in our lives, but I also remember many good times, too. I think that the happiest I ever saw her was when she went to Pennsylvania to pick up my brothers from our grandmothers house. She had all her children together again and I think she could have touched the moon. Believe me, there was some adjustment to that, but in the end it was one of the best things that she did for her family and herself. She would do without just so that her children would have the things that they needed. She was also very happy when we had Sunday dinner at Gram and Pop's house. She loved being around her entire family.




This past Saturday we had a "memorial" dinner so to speak, just like Sunday dinners. It was great, all the fmaily together, good people, good food, and in memory of my mom. Most everyone was upbeat and it was good to be around family that I have not seen in a very long time. It think it was exactly as mom would have wanted. A special thank you to my Aunt Sarah for helping organize this and the use of her home. It would not have been possible without her and I love her for that.

I could go on and on here, there is so much that I could tell you about her and maybe some other time I will tell some stories, but I will close with saying that I will love her forever and never, ever forget her. She will be in heart and soul forever. She hated saying goodbye to anyone, so I will never say goodbye, I will just say see you soon. I know she is watching over us now and will be our guardian angel until we join her, wherever and whenever that will be. I love you mom and miss you very much.

My friend's sister passed away in October 2008 and this poem was read at her funeral. I think this poem is very fitting for our family, because our chain will link again.

The Broken Chain

We little knew that morning that God was going to call your name.
In life we loved you dearly,In death we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you,You did not go alone;
For part of us went with you,The day God called you home.
You left us peaceful memories,Your love is still our guide;
And though we cannot see you,You are always at our side.
Our family chain is broken And nothing seems the same,
But as God calls us one by one,The chain will link again.

Rest in Peace, Mom, see you on the other side.

A Few Tidbits

It has been quite a while since I have blogged, there have been so many things going on in my life. I'll start first with the saddest news there is:

On January 4, 2009 at approximately 5:40 A.M. my mom passed away. This was the saddest day of my life. I will post more in a separate blog dedicated to my mom with memories of her. I love her and miss her every day.

On to some happy news:

My son and his fiance are having a baby! For those of you that know me that's not new news, but yesterday they went for an ultrasound just to make sure that everything was OK. My son called me and told me that everything was OK with my grandson! Yes, a grandson. I was so happy that I cried, he cried, she cried, we were all crying. I am so proud of my son. He is going to be a great father and we are all looking forward to the birth of Logan Michael. He is due in about 6 weeks and I cannot wait. I hope that my son and his finace are ready to put up with me a lot, because I already told them that I will be around a lot. They brought me pictures of the ultrasound, which is just amazing what they can do as far as technology goes. Little Logan looks just like my son when he was a newborn. Logan will be so loved and already is.

We will be having a memorial dinner in mom's memory and I will update that in a new blog too.

John and Marlena Final Scenes

I haven't blogged in a long time but thought I would put a little blurb in about John and Marlena exiting Days. I have never been a big fan of this couple, but I have to say that this is the worst sendoff of a soap opera couple I have ever seen. These characters were on Days for 20+ years and this is all they get? What the hell! My heart goes out to all of their fans and the disappointment they must be feeling. I would not blame one of them for tuning out from this show and never looking back.